Have you ever questioned your life’s purpose? Given serious thought to it?
Why am I here?
What will I do in the time that I have?
What will people remember me for long after I’m gone?
I think about these things a lot. Daily, even. Life is short. Fleeting. And in a single instant, without warning, it can be taken from us. I’m not sure why I’m here. And I honestly don’t know what I will do in the time that I have left. But I do hope that I’m remembered for how fiercely I loved. Maybe it’s not the most notable thing. Maybe my reach is short. But for me there is no greater gift than the ability to love someone and be loved in return.
As an empath, I feel things more deeply than others. I’m highly attuned to people’s moods, both good and bad. I feel other peoples’ pain as if it were my own, to the point of mental and physical distress. I think with my heart more often than my head and always try to fix things far beyond my control. I’ve been told I’m too sensitive, too needy, and too generous. And sadly, I’ve been taken advantage of on more than one occasion. I’m currently learning different strategies to protect my sensitivities. Setting limits and boundaries. Meditation. Mindfulness. Regular exercise. Communicating my needs to my loved ones and being more cautious with who I exert my energy on.
A friend asked me the other day if I have any friends who aren’t currently falling apart. I insisted I do, however, I’m also okay sitting in the darkness with the ones who are. It’s not as though I’m out seeking friends in crisis, though they do seem to find me. But then I thought, maybe we’re all in crisis at one point or another. Truth is, life is messy and we all have our own challenges.
And though being an empath has meant putting myself on the back burner almost all my life, I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Human connection is so integral to my being. Every friend I’ve loved and even those I’ve lost have made me who I am.
I have so little figured out when it comes to finding the balance of helping others and helping myself, as talked about in my previous post, Lonely is her favourite place to be, but I’m learning that it’s okay.
Being an empath is who I am. I’d argue it’s the best thing about me. I wear my heart proudly on my sleeve. It’s my life purpose, to help others. To soften their falls and tend to their hearts. This letter is really to anyone close to me in my life going through a difficult time. I am all in, my friend, and everything is going to be fine. ❤
***
Dear friend,
Things are pretty bad right now, I know. I see the way you wear your brave face. I know it because I wear it too. I see the pain in your eyes, their normal sparkle hiding deep below the surface. I feel your pain too. I see the weight you’re carrying around, trying to keep it all together. I’m carrying it too.
You can fall apart, my friend. For I will be there to catch you.
You can grow tired and weak, my friend. For I will remind you of your strength.
You can sit in the darkness, my friend. For I will sit there with you until you see the light.
You can give me your hand, my friend. For I will hold it tightly until you tell me to let go.
You can sit in silence, my friend. For I will sit in silence with you.
You can ask for help, my friend. For I will be your second set of hands.
You can ask what you did to deserve this, my friend. For I will remind you, nothing at all.
You can worry about the future, my friend. For I will remind you to focus on today.
You can question your worth, my friend. For I will tell you how much you matter. Every day. For as long as you need to hear it.
You can feel alone, my friend. For I will always stand beside you.
You can cry, my friend. For I will wipe away your tears.
You can share your darkest secrets, my friend. For I will keep them safe.
You can be sad, my friend. For I will hold onto your happiness.
You can be confused, my friend. For I will try and give you clarity.
You can give me just a look, my friend. For I know what you’re feeling without a word.
And when things get better, because they will get better. I’ll still be here. I will never leave you, my friend. For I know when I need all the above, you’ll be there in return.
Everything is fine. It’s fine. We’re fine.
I love you.
D
❤
…
Title Song – “Count on me” by Bruno Mars
Too Much to Lose 